In case you live under a rock... or have an IQ higher than 12, I guess you missed the absolute wonderfulness of yesterday. It was Creation Day! Yes 6013 years ago yesterday the Earth was created out of nothing... of course I wonder how the Egyptians were able to have a civilization without a planet... or without existing yet... But that pesky science (in this case Archeology... that's old History right?) must obviously be wrong since this old book really has all the answers. That's what this guy told me, he was really nice so it must be true.
Of course, besides the Jewish sects and the other 37,999 Christian sects, YOUR sect is the real one... cause they told you it was... OR better yet you KNOW it is because you feel it in your heart... Yeah, that's better than testing and retesting stuff. WAYYY better. Now I have this new cancer treatment that will cure any other disease as well. Just drink motor oil. It's made from dinosaurs and sharks and they never got cancer or diseases. What more proof do you need! Well how about if I told you GOD told me it worked! I read it on a website (the books of today) and they said God said it worked. See it's been proven by God!!! Why aren't you storming the auto parts stores buying it yet?
Best,
5 comments:
I'll trade you your cancer curing motor oil for this Tiger preventing stick.
That said, this is the only tiger preventing stick and will cost you a tad more than the cancer curing motor oil.
That is the date that James Ussher, Church of Ireland Archbishop of Armagh and Primate of All Ireland, determined to be the very first day of creation in 4004 BCE.
Remember that isn’t a recognized real date by Christianity, just something fun to use if you enjoy mockery.
It probably should also be noted young earth Creationists do change their dates a lot less than evolutionists. So if getting a couple dates wrong is reason to ridicule. Uh-oh, natural materialists you've got some 'splainin' to do! (said in my best Ricky Ricakardo voice.)
Question: If you dip the tiger preventing stick in motor oil will it prevent tigers from getting cancer?
Steve
Sadly, no.
But it will keep away any tigers that have cancer. Which is useful, because cancerous tigers are sad and depressing.
:)
I'd also like to know how dogs were domesticated without existing
Magic.
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